ATTN!!!!!!!!
ok, aft a long while, i started to confront her on the things she did to me.
she replied in a very mild way, machiam innocent innocent like tht.
i suspect she's still pretending to be nice and most prob start covering up with lies again.
shld i b nice to her or str to the cut and tell her stop pretending?
You know what? There's a way to stop this. Stop seeing her, stop messaging her, stop talking to her, stop treating her as if she exists (because she doesn't want to be in your world since she has acted the way as described in your last post). If you have to see a person being two-faced to you all the time and causing you to make wild guesses and being paranoid, then please, she's not worth your time. Too much drama. You deserve better, dude. You just need some time out.
What exactly she did to u?
Lied, cheat, cast hocus pocus on u ?
What do u want from the confrontation? Closure ?
Originally posted by BabylonPunkette:You know what? There's a way to stop this. Stop seeing her, stop messaging her, stop talking to her, stop treating her as if she exists (because she doesn't want to be in your world since she has acted the way as described in your last post). If you have to see a person being two-faced to you all the time and causing you to make wild guesses and being paranoid, then please, she's not worth your time. Too much drama. You deserve better, dude. You just need some time out.
actually i've stopped all this, just that last time she tld me let's stop for a while and talk abt it next time as she's isn't in the mood for this.
i respected that and contacted her again only aft 6 mths.
i'll be direct to her this time and tell her tht she's lying.
for me, i got nothing to lose since i do not need her anymore.
PS: actually if she's like what u mentioned, i really wonder how come she bothered to reply me when i asked her whether she wants to talk abt it now.
frankly, i was surprised that she replied as i was prepared to send a final msg, giving it everything i have. i won't give a dam abt her reply and if she did, i'll tell her to fark off
Originally posted by jojobeach:What exactly she did to u?
Lied, cheat, cast hocus pocus on u ?
What do u want from the confrontation? Closure ?
gd question.
i actually want a chance to tell her what i have in mind all this while, release all the anger and all the nonsense. i just wanna blast it out on her.
to be honest, i dnt give a dam for her reaction.
i'm gng to be really selfish here and have a "i happy can already" attitude
Originally posted by redname:ATTN!!!!!!!!
ok, aft a long while, i started to confront her on the things she did to me.
she replied in a very mild way, machiam innocent innocent like tht.
i suspect she's still pretending to be nice and most prob start covering up with lies again.
shld i b nice to her or str to the cut and tell her stop pretending?
Yes Yes, you are pissed. But be warned. She is planning to shame and make you look like a fool.
She is planning to parade her new boyfriend in front of you. Her tactic is to stall you and get everybody's support. When I say everybody, I mean all yours and hers circle of friends.
Originally posted by speakoutfor:
Yes Yes, you are pissed. But be warned. She is planning to shame and make you look like a fool.She is planning to parade her new boyfriend in front of you. Her tactic is to stall you and get everybody's support. When I say everybody, I mean all yours and hers circle of friends.
pple tht me and she know have already know her pattern already.
pple who knows me well and i care about have given me their full support.
i'm prepared to tell those who i dnt care about to just fark off.
i'm prepared to be called ungentlemanly (like who gives a fark) and if the heat is too much, i won't pull my punches back on a b!tch.
PS: and i dnt think she has a new bf yet cause she's still trying to be nice to try to pull me in and give her attention
Originally posted by redname:gd question.
i actually want a chance to tell her what i have in mind all this while, release all the anger and all the nonsense. i just wanna blast it out on her.
to be honest, i dnt give a dam for her reaction.
i'm gng to be really selfish here and have a "i happy can already" attitude
Ah I see. U want to feel like the winner.
Were u hoping she would cry, beg and be remorseful? Well didn't happen.
Even if she did, u ain't gonna take her back, yes?
U take her back, just so u can dump her , right?
Your Wounded ego is controlling u , not your brain anymore.
A selfish person is not likely to be happy. Maybe its time u try some self honesty.
Seems to me is more of an ego talking rather than common senses of the brain..
Originally posted by jojobeach:Ah I see. U want to feel like the winner.
Were u hoping she would cry, beg and be remorseful? Well didn't happen.
Even if she did, u ain't gonna take her back, yes?
U take her back, just so u can dump her , right?
Your Wounded ego is controlling u , not your brain anymore.
A selfish person is not likely to be happy. Maybe its time u try some self honesty.
truth to be told, i hope she doesn't respond cause by responding, i might get fired up more.
by firing on her, i've already accepted that we'll nvr talk again
Originally posted by Tzarh:Seems to me is more of an ego talking rather than common senses of the brain..
she hurt my ego, my emotions and everything, seriously i dnt give a fark anymore
Originally posted by redname:truth to be told, i hope she doesn't respond cause by responding, i might get fired up more.
by firing on her, i've already accepted that we'll nvr talk again
U talk tough, but u r just jelly inside.
If u don't want her to respond, then don't try to get a respond.
If u don't want to give a fark , then why are u still hurt ?
u are full of contradictions. Yet u act like u know what u want.
A relationship breaks because both party at fault. Yet all u do is point your finger at her.
Your So called "friends" will support u because that's what clansmen do. But a true friend will tell u the truth so u not make the same mistakes again.
I sense u are the passive aggressive type. These type of people , their relationship seldom last Nor happy.
It is unfortunate, u thought u could punish her, but u end up being the one left behind.
U can only hurt a person if she/he gives a fark about u, u can only hurt a person so many times until he/she is done.
Originally posted by jojobeach:U talk tough, but u r just jelly inside.
If u don't want her to respond, then don't try to get a respond.
If u don't want to give a fark , then why are u still hurt ?
u are full of contradictions. Yet u act like u know what u want.
A relationship breaks because both party at fault. Yet all u do is point your finger at her.
Your So called "friends" will support u because that's what clansmen do. But a true friend will tell u the truth so u not make the same mistakes again.
I sense u are the passive aggressive type. These type of people , their relationship seldom last Nor happy.
It is unfortunate, u thought u could punish her, but u end up being the one left behind.
U can only hurt a person if she/he gives a fark about u, u can only hurt a person so many times until he/she is done.
Ok, 1stly, i'm not sure whether u know wat u r talking abt but i'll give u a benefit of doubt since u dnt have the luxury of the whole story.
the whole motive is just for me to blast it out on her cause she didn't give a chance for me to do so previously.
i dnt need her responds and in the same time i nvr said i'm trying to get her respond
when i said i dnt give a fark, tht's aft blasting out on her and i won't give a fark abt wat pple thinks. I'm hurt by wat she did and not wat other thinks.
When i said my frens support me, i'm not saying tht they support me blasting at her, in fact, i didn't tell them abt this part cause i've hidden this anger away from them. In their mind, they thot tht redname has gotten over this gal.
i nvr said i want to punish her, all this while i just want to release it out on to her. I nvr said tht i wanna hurt her or not cause i just wanna make myself happy and tht's by blasting it out on her.
hope this clears some air cause i see couple of assumptions from ur side :)
Originally posted by redname:Ok, 1stly, i'm not sure whether u know wat u r talking abt but i'll give u a benefit of doubt since u dnt have the luxury of the whole story.
the whole motive is just for me to blast it out on her cause she didn't give a chance for me to do so previously.
i dnt need her responds and in the same time i nvr said i'm trying to get her respond
when i said i dnt give a fark, tht's aft blasting out on her and i won't give a fark abt wat pple thinks. I'm hurt by wat she did and not wat other thinks.
When i said my frens support me, i'm not saying tht they support me blasting at her, in fact, i didn't tell them abt this part cause i've hidden this anger away from them. In their mind, they thot tht redname has gotten over this gal.
i nvr said i want to punish her, all this while i just want to release it out on to her. I nvr said tht i wanna hurt her or not cause i just wanna make myself happy and tht's by blasting it out on her.
hope this clears some air cause i see couple of assumptions from ur side :)
So it's just about This need for blasting or venting or ranting out while She calmly listen to u rant , not say a word, until u are done attacking her. Yes? Grow up, cause its not gonna happen.
I suggest this..
U can do it to a pillow, a wall, at her photo.. U don't have to do it directly to her face.
Besides, why should she let u do that to her ? She is not your mom.
U are acting up like a big baby. U think your "blasting" or opinion is so important that people should let u rant on them ? And if they don't care what u have to say, or disagree, u pout and fester inside.
No wonder your relationship failed.
yes your friend thought u are one tough guy.. Because u pretend to be one. Then u laments why people can't seem to understand u, and u feel so alone.
Tough guys live a tough life. If u arnt truly tough , don't try to be one.
Passive aggressors tend to be cryptic. They don't tell the whole story most of the time. They spin the story so people won't know the truth. That's how they protect themselves when they act passive aggressively, by denying the truth.
U keep saying she did stuff to hurt u, but u refused to say exactly what. Are u afraid to face the fact that u deserved it ?
Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
good one darkie, red name is in the early phase.
However, understanding the process does not prevent another failure.
Denial – The person getting broken up with is unable to admit that the relationship is really over. They may try to continue to call the person when they want to be left alone.
Anger – When the reality sets in that the relationship is over, it is common to demand to know why they are being broken up with. This phase can make them feel like they are being treated unfairly and it may cause them to become angry at people close to them who want to help aid the situation.
Bargaining – After the anger stage, one will try to plead with their former partner by promising that whatever caused the break up will never happen again. Example: “I can change, please give me a chance”.
Depression – Next the person might feel discouraged that their bargaining plea did not convince their former partner to change their mind. This will send the person into the depression stage and can cause a lack of sleep, eating and even disrupt daily life tasks.
Acceptance – Moving on from the situation and person is the last stage. The person accepts that the relationship is over and begins to move forward with their life. The person might not be completely over the situation but they are done going back and forth to the point where they can accept the reality of the situation
Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
I think redname is still in the first two stages, more leaning towards anger.
I don't think redname's really over this girl. Pretty sure that he really invested his time and effort for the relationship and the fact that it just didn't work out well enough in the end pissed him off. It's never healthy to get angry and vent on the other party, though.
Originally posted by jojobeach:So it's just about This need for blasting or venting or ranting out while She calmly listen to u rant , not say a word, until u are done attacking her. Yes? Grow up, cause its not gonna happen.
I suggest this..
U can do it to a pillow, a wall, at her photo.. U don't have to do it directly to her face.
Besides, why should she let u do that to her ? She is not your mom.
U are acting up like a big baby. U think your "blasting" or opinion is so important that people should let u rant on them ? And if they don't care what u have to say, or disagree, u pout and fester inside.
No wonder your relationship failed.
yes your friend thought u are one tough guy.. Because u pretend to be one. Then u laments why people can't seem to understand u, and u feel so alone.
Tough guys live a tough life. If u arnt truly tough , don't try to be one.
assumptions again.
anyway, i do know tht wat i've mention is particularly not the best but i've tried so many methods to get over this and yet this hurt is still inside.
i figured out tht i just need to let her know tht i've been keeping it in me all this while and i really have to let it out to move on.
Originally posted by re_animated:I think redname is still in the first two stages, more leaning towards anger.
I don't think redname's really over this girl. Pretty sure that he really invested his time and effort for the relationship and the fact that it just didn't work out well enough in the end pissed him off. It's never healthy to get angry and vent on the other party, though.
i've actually had the bargaining stage and had been depressed for nearly 3 mths.
my anger comes in when i finally realise wat this gal have been doing.
My stages are kind of not following the squence
perhaps i shld tell u guys why i'm so angry.
i've actually accepted the fact tht we can't be together and I won't pursue tht matter again.
she at an early stage have lost interest in this but continued to flirt with me etc, thus leading me on.
when i thot of this, i felt very angry cause my feelings for her increased thru out tht period tht she was leading me on.
had she stopped this at the early stage, then the damage wldn't b tht bad cause i wldn't b so emotionally attached.
i feel angry tht it's unfair tht i have to be depressed for so long just because tht attention seeking b!tch haven't had enough of her share of attention
Originally posted by redname:pple tht me and she know have already know her pattern already.
pple who knows me well and i care about have given me their full support.
i'm prepared to tell those who i dnt care about to just fark off.
i'm prepared to be called ungentlemanly (like who gives a fark) and if the heat is too much, i won't pull my punches back on a b!tch.
PS: and i dnt think she has a new bf yet cause she's still trying to be nice to try to pull me in and give her attention
Look pal. Its a trap. I can smell it far away.
She's nice to you so she can lure you to pursue her even more. She's gonna collect evidence from you such as your sms text, facebook mssg, yahoo mssg and phone conversations. Then she's gonna bring out her new boyfriend to shame you.
If you have interested in her, how long would it take for other guys to pursue her?
Whether you like it or not, stay on and you'll see how she will make you look like a fool.
Only way is to move on and forget about her. I dunno if this is a school or work environment. Just sit there and act like nothing happen. Like she's not important. Then all will go away. If any friend ask you, how are you? just pretend nothing happen and talk about something else.
Originally posted by redname:perhaps i shld tell u guys why i'm so angry.
i've actually accepted the fact tht we can't be together and I won't pursue tht matter again.
she at an early stage have lost interest in this but continued to flirt with me etc, thus leading me on.
when i thot of this, i felt very angry cause my feelings for her increased thru out tht period tht she was leading me on.
had she stopped this at the early stage, then the damage wldn't b tht bad cause i wldn't b so emotionally attached.
i feel angry tht it's unfair tht i have to be depressed for so long just because tht attention seeking b!tch haven't had enough of her share of attention
She won't be the last person who is going to do this to you.
A lot of girls are like this.
If you are a player, you got to take it easy.
If you full of emo...go seek new girlfriend at your nearest dating agency. Emo people won't survive in social circles.
Originally posted by jojobeach:good one darkie, red name is in the early phase.
However, understanding the process does not prevent another failure.
Grieving a break-up
Denial – The person getting broken up with is unable to admit that the relationship is really over. They may try to continue to call the person when they want to be left alone.
Anger – When the reality sets in that the relationship is over, it is common to demand to know why they are being broken up with. This phase can make them feel like they are being treated unfairly and it may cause them to become angry at people close to them who want to help aid the situation.
Bargaining – After the anger stage, one will try to plead with their former partner by promising that whatever caused the break up will never happen again. Example: “I can change, please give me a chance”.
Depression – Next the person might feel discouraged that their bargaining plea did not convince their former partner to change their mind. This will send the person into the depression stage and can cause a lack of sleep, eating and even disrupt daily life tasks.
Acceptance – Moving on from the situation and person is the last stage. The person accepts that the relationship is over and begins to move forward with their life. The person might not be completely over the situation but they are done going back and forth to the point where they can accept the reality of the situation
hey you got your definition wrong.
Its not a break-up.
Its handling rejection.
Originally posted by speakoutfor:Look pal. Its a trap. I can smell it far away.
She's nice to you so she can lure you to pursue her even more. She's gonna collect evidence from you such as your sms text, facebook mssg, yahoo mssg and phone conversations. Then she's gonna bring out her new boyfriend to shame you.
If you have interested in her, how long would it take for other guys to pursue her?
Whether you like it or not, stay on and you'll see how she will make you look like a fool.
Only way is to move on and forget about her. I dunno if this is a school or work environment. Just sit there and act like nothing happen. Like she's not important. Then all will go away. If any friend ask you, how are you? just pretend nothing happen and talk about something else.
ok, from reading your msg, it seems like if i were to respond, i'll just be nasty or direct to her cause i'm not pursuing her at all. I will not have anything tht indicates tht i'm still interested in her or pursuing her