Think My Wife Is Having Affair
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Originally posted by Jlsky70:
i did tell her i can buy her and that guy drinks, told her repeatedly. She kept on saying no need and insisted that i go back 1st. I refused at first and continue to walk wth them to the carpark. I left after she chose to just ignore me and drove away.
It's time, you give her what she wants.
When time and condition permits, ask her this
" What exactly do you want out of this ?"
Do not interrupt, just listen.
Let her some time to think it through.
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Jlsky70, believe me, if she chew the hell out of you, you still have some hope.
Living people bite, the dead don't.
Its finished between you and her.
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its not only finished....its humiliation...
do your part as a man...
spare her no chance
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u must challenge what is the biased perception that men must assume the burden of proof that fault lies with them while women do not have such equal responsibility...
she has laid before you with another man on many occassions and she is waiting for you to initiate the ultimatum...
do not spare her the slightest chance....
i blame the system we are in....
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umm... so I should start asking what are both of your jobs?
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u can get her back once, or twice...but feelings can turn into flowers of evil....and she will never be the one you have known...
u must challenge what is the biased perception that men must assume the burden of proof that fault lies with them while women do not have such equal responsibility...
stand up to this biased system we are living in
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There is nothing you can do about the past. Whats done is done. No point scolding you or her. Does not matter whose fault.
There is only the future.
The obligation is on you to improve your life, and that of your daughter. Don't fall into the trap of maintaining a charade for the sake of you daughter. This would be worse than the divorce.
You have tried desperately, there is a point when enough is enough.
The marriage has irretrievablely broken down. She don't have the slightest respect for you. You are hoping against hope. She will turn around only if its advantages to her, then she will discard you again.
So make up your mind to dump her now, before you crack, and we read about you in the papers.
Its difficult, but take one step at a time. Steel yourself and drop into a lawyers office, and go on from there. Make that move, or else you will be here playing that same old song again and again like what Fugazzi said.
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Tsk tsk tsk ...what do you know .....A bunch of singles cheering on a married man to divorce his wife.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Tsk tsk tsk ...what do you know .....A bunch of singles cheering on a married man to divorce his wife.
Yup, we ain't about to ask him to treat his wife as you would like the klutsks in your life to treat you.
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Originally posted by mancha:
Yup, we ain't about to ask him to treat his wife as you would like the klutsks in your life to treat you.
Get yourself a woman first before you teach other men how to keep (or not) a wife.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Get yourself a woman first before you teach other men how to keep (or not) a wife.
Stop riding you issues on other people's problem.
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I seems quite obvious and confirm that she is having an affair with that guy. I have let go of my pride to ask her to go back with me in front of him, but yet she turned me down and humiliated me in front of him by going off with him in front of me.
she didn't come home last night. She only came back around noon time today to spend some time with our daughter and left just a few hours later. She is not back yet. I confronted her and demanded to have a talk with her. But she refused to talk and chose to ignore my questions, even after i raised my voice and showed my unhappiness and anger.
I am very very sad. What has become of her. Why is she treating me like this? She is the love of my life and she's hurting me so badly.
Divorce is certainly on my mind, but deep down inside, i'm thinking whether there is still hope in this marriage. I have too many things on my mind now. Confused and not sure what to do next.
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lols... it takes 2 hands to clap... so i wonder wad did ts do wrong such that his wife had to act like this. While marriage might jus be a paper thing, it is still a commitment. There has been no reason yet for his wife to act the way she is.
Lets try to empathise with him and not ride on his problem nor overly blame him. He needs emotional support and i believe TS is really having a hard time.
Mancha, haven you know that it is a "all guys fault thingy" in the eyes of some ppl. For every single thing that happened, TS is always at fault, filled with guilt, lack of everything a woman needs. But no one has taken a look at what TS really needs. Hopefully u get wad im trying to say.
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Originally posted by Jlsky70:
I seems quite obvious and confirm that she is having an affair with that guy. I have let go of my pride to ask her to go back with me in front of him, but yet she turned me down and humiliated me in front of him by going off with him in front of me.
she didn't come home last night. She only came back around noon time today to spend some time with our daughter and left just a few hours later. She is not back yet. I confronted her and demanded to have a talk with her. But she refused to talk and chose to ignore my questions, even after i raised my voice and showed my unhappiness and anger.
I am very very sad. What has become of her. Why is she treating me like this? She is the love of my life and she's hurting me so badly.
Divorce is certainly on my mind, but deep down inside, i'm thinking whether there is still hope in this marriage. I have too many things on my mind now. Confused and not sure what to do next.
You are like any foolish prideful male forumers here. Thinking a few Gucci/LV bags and Jimmy Choo shoes or tours to exotic places are all it takes to make your wife happy. No, women are more complicated than that !
Think about this, if she is truly set on leaving you, she don't need your permission to divorce you. She can go to the lawyer office herself and seek a divorce on her own.
In fact, the sooner she seeks a divorce, the sooner she will be released from it all. Why has she not done it yet ?
In her heart.. she has doubts. Because she know the next ship she jumps onto, may turn out a sinking ship too.
To salvage this ship, you need to be a better man for her. If she sees the change in you and see a future.. she will stay. We all know.. the pasture is not always greener on the other side.
The only way it can be greener.. is when the current one is as lousy as a pig sty.
Think about the issues she had been unhappy with in the past, figure out how to resolve the problems, not sweep it under the carpet.
Show genuine repentence.. there is still hope.
She is punishing you right now. Just stay calm. The more angry and unhappy you are.. the more vengence she feels.
The whole marriage had been all about you.. it's time you let her take the reign.
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This kind of woman, let go of her bah~ you will find a better one in future.
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Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
This kind of woman, let go of her bah~ you will find a better one in future.
You mean a step mother for his daughter ?
So if he cannot ? Are you going to sleep with him ?
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If she is angry or sore at you, she would show it. She is not.
Anger is an emotion. If she has it, then it augurs well for you, as that emotion is only not a desirable one. It would show she has feelings for you, and she is unhappy about some things. But there is none.
But no anger. No emotions, thats bad. Not even regard for you.
When she has no regard for you as a person, her husband, the father of your daughter, then all is lost. It will be a one sided affair on your part.
You can try to win her back, by romancing her again. You have to honestly ask yourself, will it work. Will it hold.
You make a statement of intent first, then act on it. The latter part is the most important, otherwise nothing happens, and you will remain in the confused state.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
You mean a step mother for his daughter ?
So if he cannot ? Are you going to sleep with him ?
So if he can, are you going to be extra? -
Originally posted by [imdestinyz]:
lols... it takes 2 hands to clap... so i wonder wad did ts do wrong such that his wife had to act like this. While marriage might jus be a paper thing, it is still a commitment. There has been no reason yet for his wife to act the way she is.
Lets try to empathise with him and not ride on his problem nor overly blame him. He needs emotional support and i believe TS is really having a hard time.
Mancha, haven you know that it is a "all guys fault thingy" in the eyes of some ppl. For every single thing that happened, TS is always at fault, filled with guilt, lack of everything a woman needs. But no one has taken a look at what TS really needs. Hopefully u get wad im trying to say.
The relationship has gone beyond the fault finding stage now.
OK so if it is established that the fault lies here and there. Lets take corrective action. Do you think there will be a reversal?
TS is dead to her. She don't give a damn to his feelings.
What TS needs to do is to act, not rehash the scenarios repeatedly.
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Women are vindictive creatures.
You disrespect them or disregard them, they will one day when you least expect it, do the same to you. Only it will be 10 times more painful.
TS, what have you done in the past ?
Were you caught flirting with your office slut ?
Were you caught ogling at other women in her presence too many times ?
Something tells me you had been a bad boy. Disregarding your wife is a bad bad choice.
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Originally posted by mancha:
The relationship has gone beyond the fault finding stage now.
OK so if it is established that the fault lies here and there. Lets take corrective action. Do you think there will be a reversal?
TS is dead to her. She don't give a damn to his feelings.
What TS needs to do is to act, not rehash the scenarios repeatedly.
Had TS been mindful of his wife's feelings ? Maybe not..
So she's doing the same to him now.
Act brashful.. and there be a lifetime of regrets for him, not you.
You sound the horn, he is the one facing the battle.
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some women are naturally born slut.
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Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
So if he can, are you going to be extra?He'll have to seek permission from my husband first.
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Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
some women are naturally born slut.
Really ? So you are saying TS slept with a slut, and married and had a child with one. How insulting.
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I guess your level of understanding is very low. :)