SINCERELY NEED SOME GUIDANCE
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Hi people, I'm 20 this year. Badly screwed up in life. I've been failing in everything i do. I need some guidance from you people. Let's cut the chase. I'll fill you guys in with some of the things I've fucked up with.
Everything went bad since I'm 17. I did badly for my O levels thrice. My determination to put in effort didn't stick with me till the end that is why I'm screwing up my O levels. It seems to others that I wasn't taken aback by my lesson each time I retook my O levels & in fact I deserve it. I tried going into ITE, I'm doing quite average in the first quarter of the 2 year course but nevertheless I lost interest in the course & I dropped out. I've always wanted to do architecture but I never knew when to start till I've been reading some articles recently that actually I could do civil engineering with structural design higher nitec in ITE to progress further. Question is I've yet finished my army, by the time I'm done with army I am 23 years old. If I were to go on to pursue my ambition that will eventually cost me 11 years of my life which includes diplomas, masters degree etc where my friends are earning big bucks. By then I'll be 33years old. I know it would not be wise to go into the work society with just my O levels. Well really, this pile of shit I've done totally screw me up. I need some guidance from you people, should I be going all out for my ambition? or start work after army? I am totally in a mess right now, I've no idea what to do. I don't wanna fail my parent's expectation towards me again & neither do I wanna fail myself anymore.
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Pursue your ambition.
There are people who are still 23 years old with only O level cert, because they choose a different route.
Nothing wrong with that. All good 
Take care~ -
1) try to defer your NS as late as possible
2) Check the costs for the 11 years and how you will support yourself through those times
3) Make sure those 11 years are spent in something worthwhile, most private institutions are money makers and their qualification dont count for nuts.
4) Good Luck!
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You screwed up because you have no vision in life. You don't have core beliefs which you can hold onto. You don't know what you want, so called "goals" are weak and hence, nothing to pull you towards.
Sort out that aspect first and things will fall in place.
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it would be better to fail now than much later....the 11 years are important and u will definitely be behind your peers who may already being owning their own condos or even landed properties....of course if they had good networking and career luck....
u really need to seriously sit back and reflect what u really want...but u cannot have everthing in life...no one does unless u were born with golden spoon....
btw...architecture in NUS may not be easy to get in...unless u have good grades for A levels....and many have gone overseas to do on campus for years....in fact most great architects are hotly demanded with overseas experiences...
another way to find out is what do architects really do every day.....can you accept the life of getting screams from clients who keep asking you to change designs after designs until they are absolutely satisfied? and hold you responsible for any liabilities arising from your designs? can you start off as a project manager, instead of thinking to be the like of I M Pei who sits in a big office and directs the architects and throw off your months of designs into the rubbish bin with a simple "no standard"?
perhaps you would like to network with some intern architects to find out more before u decide what u really want....
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architecture is an admirable discipline and offers great career satisfaction if you are really passionate about....the Pritzker Prize (often known as the Nobel Prize for Architecture) awaits the next da vinci....good luck bro!
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Go to the army and sort out what to do later. What is the point now to talk about this?
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... "i'm 20 this year. Badly screwed up in life. I've been failing in everything i do..."
I think you are being too hard on yourself young man :) .. why be so negative when things don't turn out what the way u want it ? at the age of 20, its a x-road junction to start finding out more about yourself and discovering or understanding whats around u. it Is prefectly alright to 'fail and fail' and feel lousy about it now.. not to forget its through failure and set-backs that one truly learnt the meaning of success and appreciate the lessons behind every journey n steps we take to reach the end destination.
How u preceive failure and success ??? What is your strengths and weakness ??
I don't think that you are 'in a mess'... maybe alittle lost and disheartened but if you were to sit yourself down and look at your life from a different perspective again, you will realise that you 'do' have a cue to what YOU want in life... for sure you might not see it when you said " i have no idea what to do.." cause by you writing out to seek advise and sharing your feelings and thoughts here is in a way 'doing something'... Bring out the self-belief in you !! Only you can make a difference to YOUR life... and its never too late unless you telling me you days are numbered !!?? Don't let anyone tell you what's right or wrong ... or 'you hv no vision... no goals... ' or ... as everyone has their way of thinking and values that guide them well, but may not apply to everyone. Its okie to listen wht others think... but don't forget to 'hear' the voice inside YOU !!
so.. you can doubt all i have said above... but Trust me on this- " Trust yourself !!! "
n you be surprised when you look back 20..30yrs later in life and said : " why did i actually sweat over it anyway ??? " hee...
relax... enjoy simple pleasure in life wherever you are and in whatever you do.. its not about doing big things , its about doing small things in a BIG way. ( like going to ur parents and showing your gratitude towards them for being with you and loving you for these years when u are down down and hardest-hit... somethin are more important in life )
All the best ... Inshah Allah my prayers goes to you :)
levis.
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life is not abt paper-chasing
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Everyone have a talent... what's yours? You don't seem to be able to concentrate on your studies, whatever the problem it is, i think it's easier if you pursue your ambition and start your own biz... when you do your own biz, all people start equal, even if they have phd, they still have to start from scratch (assuming they never inherit from someone else)...
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"My determination to put in effort didn't stick with me till the end that is why I'm screwing up my O levels. It seems to others that I wasn't taken aback by my lesson each time I retook my O levels & in fact I deserve it."
Do you seriously know what you want in life?
A O level gra can only earn $1000+ a month.
A degree grad can only earn starting $2500+ a month.
In singapore even a degree does not worth much nowdays.
Question is if you have not finish a basic ITE cert, how can you even feed your own parents?
The Reason why everyone studies so hard is actually they want a better life. Please do not envy others who are earning big bucks because they worked hard in their studies.
Have you ask yourself why you do not have the determination to work hard in your studies? maybe because you do not see the need for it.You are currently well fed and money is given to you by your parents but have you thought that they will also retire and need your support too
.Do you really want to slog like hell for 12 hours a day earning $1k a month with no chance of getting out this cycle or work hard to get a degree which at least give you the starting salary of $2.5k a month and possible to earn higher?
You have to decide your own path no one can decide for you.
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me too, i always scared angel will divorce me
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there are people chasing after their dreams but passion died down and chase after money when they have awakened...
there are people who are rich but gave up everything to save their health from further destruction and lead a simple and peaceful life that money cannot buy...
there are people who are superstars but wished themselves away from the limelight for fear one day their true selves are exposed and leads very private lives hoping that the world forgets them...
life is so full of ironies...
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You are not in a total mess as long as you have not commited any crime.
You just have to find more books on self-help to know what you want.
Not every one is born with vision and goals so you are not so bad.
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The thing that is much bandied about one's future is a big ''lie''. The paradox of it is it alwayss comes as now. So what does one do when oné's future is a concern. Start from where u are now - every single decision, every single thought will transform and that is very freeing and one might just get to realise what one deems as future
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Originally posted by Rock^Star:
You screwed up because you have no vision in life. You don't have core beliefs which you can hold onto. You don't know what you want, so called "goals" are weak and hence, nothing to pull you towards.
Sort out that aspect first and things will fall in place.
You should have thought of what you want in life while still on Parents' scholarship.
Nevermind that now. Have your goal fixed first.
For the time being drop everything and serve NS, with a clear mind, no negativity, like it is useless and a waste of taxpayers money etc. Serve NS whole heartedly. It will set you with the right foundation for living life. Hopefully while serving NS you will discover what your life should be all about. Then go for it.
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Originally posted by FireIce:
life is not abt paper-chasing
It is about to tame your mind so that you leave very less space besides your ambition. However, to succeed without losing your glory of humility, engage in community works even in the army...:D
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Originally posted by Whimsy:
It is about to tame your mind so that you leave very less space besides your ambition. However, to succeed without losing your glory of humility, engage in community works even in the army...:D
tame yr mind? or your mind should tame you instead, and for god sake, army is never a community work, it is war and dead, for humility sake, erase arms and army, this world would had been better -
Originally posted by Flyingonhotrockets:
Hi people, I'm 20 this year. Badly screwed up in life. I've been failing in everything i do. I need some guidance from you people. Let's cut the chase. I'll fill you guys in with some of the things I've fucked up with.
Everything went bad since I'm 17. I did badly for my O levels thrice. My determination to put in effort didn't stick with me till the end that is why I'm screwing up my O levels. It seems to others that I wasn't taken aback by my lesson each time I retook my O levels & in fact I deserve it. I tried going into ITE, I'm doing quite average in the first quarter of the 2 year course but nevertheless I lost interest in the course & I dropped out. I've always wanted to do architecture but I never knew when to start till I've been reading some articles recently that actually I could do civil engineering with structural design higher nitec in ITE to progress further. Question is I've yet finished my army, by the time I'm done with army I am 23 years old. If I were to go on to pursue my ambition that will eventually cost me 11 years of my life which includes diplomas, masters degree etc where my friends are earning big bucks. By then I'll be 33years old. I know it would not be wise to go into the work society with just my O levels. Well really, this pile of shit I've done totally screw me up. I need some guidance from you people, should I be going all out for my ambition? or start work after army? I am totally in a mess right now, I've no idea what to do. I don't wanna fail my parent's expectation towards me again & neither do I wanna fail myself anymore.
It is better to be lost than to be found, lost is actually fun, it give you the opportunity to search and do what you want to best, once found, game over. -
Originally posted by angel7030:
tame yr mind? or your mind should tame you instead, and for god sake, army is never a community work, it is war and dead, for humility sake, erase arms and army, this world would had been better
the morden army's role is very differnce from what you see on movies lah. please don;t be writing like a silly girl okay. you like army i got my old army number 4 uniform i can wear it next time for you during photoshoots. -
Originally posted by angel7030:
It is better to be lost than to be found, lost is actually fun, it give you the opportunity to search and do what you want to best, once found, game over.ype it is better to hide and cover a little - i like it this way
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Everyone like to ask, why like this, why like that, why it happen to me or how come it turn up like this etc etc etc...then many go into saddness and depression when things do not work out and keep asking question on why, how etc etc.
One thing for sure, as an Angel, let me spread the truth of life in your human nature, life is not make to be perfect, human are not make to be perfect, they are born to make mistake and from mistake, improve on it to seek perfection, by seeking perfection, it does no imply perfect. The world knows, perfectionist died early, because once human reach perfection, this human world will cease to exist. Does not mean if you are a PhD, you are a perfect person, or that you are a priest, you are prefect, these are all merely searching for perfection which most cannot do it in their whole life.
In understanding the above on life and perfection analogy, i hope TS can understand and better enlightened to answer his or her own question. Mistake is what human race to strive on, the forever searching and learning and changing is what churn the human mind and race. If everyone of us reach a perfection state, all get Phd, all behave very well, this world will cease to end. Make failures a part of your life, recognise it as a way to improve or change rather than keep asking why this and that, which by 80yo, u also cannot find the answer.
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jiaoway this one on top of me
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Hi,
Erm....i think you dun need diplomas/degrees to succeed in Singapore....if you are so determined....why not put your business ideas to work? Start a business and make more $ than a common employment income?
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Originally posted by troublemaker2005:
jiaoway this one on top of me
Parkway Parade