Have a crush on a colleague but...
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Originally posted by Rock^Star:
There's a saying like: "Don't do shit at the workplace". I don't mean to say that what you're doing is but it's true, keep conduct at the workplace professional. And affairs can seriously mean a sacking if it gets out of hand unless you're highly valued.
Highly valued employee ? LOL... sorry there is no such thing .. perhaps if he is David Copperfield.
EVERYONE is replaceable nowaday except the OWNER of that company. Even a founder of a corporation can be easily ousted.
We've lost VPs and Directors to office scandals.. and sadly.. those girls they had affairs with were merely average looking.
That's why Chinese Emperors were smart.. they CASTRATE Eunuchs so they may serve in the forbidden city.
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i think end of the day you just wan to fu_k her. cause she got nice body. nice boos and a pretty face.
you are just lusting for her cause you sick of eating the same meat everytime. you need a fresh meat. just go geylang and find a good fu_k better
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Highly valued employee ? LOL... sorry there is no such thing .. perhaps if he is David Copperfield.
EVERYONE is replaceable nowaday except the OWNER of that company. Even a founder of a corporation can be easily ousted.
We've lost VPs and Directors to office scandals.. and sadly.. those girls they had affairs with were merely average looking.
That's why Chinese Emperors were smart.. they CASTRATE Eunuchs so they may serve in the forbidden city.
Doesn't help for advice with all that cynicism and stereotyping. Your company is your small little world.
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Originally posted by Hwaimeng:
i think end of the day you just wan to fu_k her. cause she got nice body. nice boos and a pretty face.
you are just lusting for her cause you sick of eating the same meat everytime. you need a fresh meat. just go geylang and find a good fu_k better
And that's how you think? Takes one to know one.
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sadly, ur married.....just this alone should put you back on the right track. if it doesn't, hopefully you have no kids....
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Originally posted by Rock^Star:
Doesn't help for advice with all that cynicism and stereotyping. Your company is your small little world.
Sure, doesn't help for people in denial.
Go ahead , indulge in self-importance..turn a blind eye to what's happening out there.
Afterall.. what happened to others will never happen to you , yes ?
Riiiiight !
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Originally posted by Rock^Star:
There's a saying like: "Don't do shit at the workplace". .......
wa lao.......then stomak pain jialat man -
TS, since you are somebody in the company (I mean a dept head), I probably strongly advise you not to get involved with your female staff. Not worth it if anything happen. You get boot out and that is the end of your salary. For her, still ok, she's still young and can work any company. Unlike you. So think carefully, as what other forumer said: Dont shit at your company backyard.
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First of all, I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of you for your time to read this thread and provide me valuable advice and comments.
I'm sincerely grateful to all of you and your strong comments have saved me from further drowning myself.
Well, you may not trust my word but please believe me, don't condemn me at this point of time. I need to talk to someone about this but I have none to tell. So I come here for help. I am trying my best to keep myself away from the temptations.
Though it's difficult to stay clean, I will definitely make sure I don't cross the thin line.
I will always re-visit this thread and update for any progress. It won't be bad news, I strongly believe.
I'm going to distant myself from this girl.
Communicate only on work related issues.
I will always come back to read the comments here so as to keep myself afloat.
Times will tell. May God bless and help me.
Once again, thank you.
:)
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Many years ago, I do have a crush with my colleagues (same dept) and it was hell, my work spiral downwards, my attitude gone, all my hardwork gone. I learnt a good lesson.
Hope you will be strong and not let a girl destory your career.
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u said the communication with your wife has gone down.....so work to increase it!
i also agree with all the other posts about focussing and not putting your job on the line.
Me think if the communication with your wife improves, then you emotional gaps will be more occupied leaving less room for the chiobu at work. The remaining urges will just have to be controlled.
If cannot, use rubberband to tie.
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Originally posted by sucksbigtime:
I posted but it didn't show up so I re-post it. Moderator please remove it for double posting.
I really feel shameful and sorry for what I'm going to describe in the following.
My company recently employed a female staff to be my assistant.
She is cute and friendly.
The first time I saw her, she caught my attention. Most of the time I did not dare to look into her eyes directly while talking to her, worry that I might not be able to carry on with my points. Sometimes I too noticed that she tried to avoid my eyes during conversation relating to work.
Sooner I knew I have a crush on her. I'm also aware that I should NOT even have such feeling towards a young girl like her (she's 20 yrs younger than me) in the first place.
She is the reason I go to office daily.
I'll miss her whenever she's out of office.
I feel like a kid looking for candies.
I want to know more about her.
I want to take her out for dinner.
If she rejects me, end of the story, period. Carry on with my life.
Otherwise I'll be sorry for what I did.
I'm sorry because I'm already married to a lovely wife. I still love my wife as much as she loves me. However I must agree that we communicate very much lesser than before.
I think my mind is going haywire, something in there not right. I'm sick!
Am I terribly crazy? Am I wrong to fall for a young girl? Is there any way to cure my sick mind? Is it evil for me to have such thought of loving another girl beside the one I should love?
Is there anyone who read this thread had the same situation as mine? Please share with me your story and how did you handle it.
I don't want to hurt anybody.
I want to know how should I overcome this crisis.
I worry that the lack of concentration on my work will affect my performance.
Thank you so much for the advice. Be it bad or good. Very much appreciated.
Sorry if I have asked too much.
This usually occur to most Uncles at work, once I work for a male boss, he also like me very much, finally, I told him, he is too old for me, and he should treat me like his daughter or younger sister, not long after that, I left when my Dad called me up to help him, prior to my leaving, I told him to be loyal to his wife, she is a female like me, just that age might had caught up with her, if he wanted to evade all these unneccesarry attraction to young cheerful gal it can be done by bringing his wife to occasional company function, let your wife knows your colleagues, know where and what type of work you do, your wife will appreciate you, your colleagues and the work you do for the family.As for you, by bringing your wife along clearly state that you mean work and gathering, no hanky panky business in the company, and you will automatically discipline yourself to stick by the rules of a marriage life.
So, finally, in my farewell lunch, I told him to bring his wife, I get to know her so well, we enjoy each other company up to today, we still contact each other like sisters, and this man was so grateful of me, if I am those sleazy wife destroyer type, his marriage might be gone.
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Ts, ""I'm sorry because I'm already married to a lovely wife. I still love my wife as much as she loves me. However I must agree that we communicate very much lesser than before" The aforementioned suffices to that the marriage has become a ''jaded'' affair for u. That seems to be the predicament That gal in your office has brought out what has been repressed within you. Probably, something that has been latent in your unconscious (most likely repressed) has surfaced. As to what it is that is repressed/denied/ignored will not go away. It will surface and till you recognize, undestand and hopefully reconcile to that aspect .... u may stay in the marriage, u may ignore this gal, but it does not go away. Itr will sooner or later happen elsewhere! The problem is not being married or being in a relationship. The problem is that in the house just like the tv, sofa .... the human BEINGS in the household have also unconsciously become ''things''. Used and put aside and only to be used again. Of course, it is perfecly alrite to that with a tv or ... human beings need to relate and when that element is absent - ithe inexorable ''demise'' is bound to happen and the next thing is one feels trapped and one wants to escape. Escaping works but only for a while. No one can ''fix'' it and one is doomed to repeat the same old melodrama and disillusionment sets in.
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Originally posted by angel7030:
This usually occur to most Uncles at work, once I work for a male boss, he also like me very much, finally, I told him, he is too old for me, and he should treat me like his daughter or younger sister, not long after that, I left when my Dad called me up to help him, prior to my leaving, I told him to be loyal to his wife, she is a female like me, just that age might had caught up with her, if he wanted to evade all these unneccesarry attraction to young cheerful gal it can be done by bringing his wife to occasional company function, let your wife knows your colleagues, know where and what type of work you do, your wife will appreciate you, your colleagues and the work you do for the family.As for you, by bringing your wife along clearly state that you mean work and gathering, no hanky panky business in the company, and you will automatically discipline yourself to stick by the rules of a marriage life.
So, finally, in my farewell lunch, I told him to bring his wife, I get to know her so well, we enjoy each other company up to today, we still contact each other like sisters, and this man was so grateful of me, if I am those sleazy wife destroyer type, his marriage might be gone.
noble.....
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...but desperate
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like real. you all believe this shittale story she made up
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To the thread starter, I sympathize with your situation. On one hand, I feel that you're a nice person because at least you understand that you have a wife and you're married and you understand all that you're doing doesn't seems right. On the other hand, you wanted to get together with that new girl.
There is no right answer to your situation. Morally right decision is to focus on your work and your marriage, not that girl. But on the other hand, I know of so many husbands who strayed and have mistress outside so I'm not going to make you feel bad. I really sympathize with your situation.
I think you need to weigh the pros and cons. What happens if the r/s cause you to lose your job, can you afford that to happen? What if your wife finds out and divorce you, can you afford that to happen? If all that doesn't matter, then perhaps, you should give that girl a shot and see if anything happens.
Seriously, whatever you do, make sure your backside is covered.
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Originally posted by angel7030:
This usually occur to most Uncles at work, once I work for a male boss, he also like me very much, finally, I told him, he is too old for me, and he should treat me like his daughter or younger sister, not long after that, I left when my Dad called me up to help him, prior to my leaving, I told him to be loyal to his wife, she is a female like me, just that age might had caught up with her, if he wanted to evade all these unneccesarry attraction to young cheerful gal it can be done by bringing his wife to occasional company function, let your wife knows your colleagues, know where and what type of work you do, your wife will appreciate you, your colleagues and the work you do for the family.As for you, by bringing your wife along clearly state that you mean work and gathering, no hanky panky business in the company, and you will automatically discipline yourself to stick by the rules of a marriage life.
So, finally, in my farewell lunch, I told him to bring his wife, I get to know her so well, we enjoy each other company up to today, we still contact each other like sisters, and this man was so grateful of me, if I am those sleazy wife destroyer type, his marriage might be gone.
Ya ya ya ...
Quit over-flattering yourself.
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Originally posted by DailyFreeGames.com:
To the thread starter, I sympathize with your situation. On one hand, I feel that you're a nice person because at least you understand that you have a wife and you're married and you understand all that you're doing doesn't seems right. On the other hand, you wanted to get together with that new girl.
There is no right answer to your situation. Morally right decision is to focus on your work and your marriage, not that girl. But on the other hand, I know of so many husbands who strayed and have mistress outside so I'm not going to make you feel bad. I really sympathize with your situation.
I think you need to weigh the pros and cons. What happens if the r/s cause you to lose your job, can you afford that to happen? What if your wife finds out and divorce you, can you afford that to happen? If all that doesn't matter, then perhaps, you should give that girl a shot and see if anything happens.
Seriously, whatever you do, make sure your backside is covered.
精神出轨 is still 出轨 loh ~~~
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Hi sucksbigtime
All I can say is, do remember your marriage vow.
Once I heard an old man telling me this, 'I may not marry the woman I love most, but my wife MUST be the woman I most loved.'
Frankly, I took weeks to fully understood that phase. If I am not wrong, it means, from time to time, our feeling may sway, and other pretty creature may caught our attention. But we need to put in our effort to ensure that we always stay focus, and love the woman we married.
It is more of an conscious effort, rather than just feeling. I am sure you will understanding.
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Originally posted by Mel.greywolf:
Hi sucksbigtime
All I can say is, do remember your marriage vow.
Once I heard an old man telling me this, 'I may not marry the woman I love most, but my wife MUST be the woman I most loved.'
Frankly, I took weeks to fully understood that phase. If I am not wrong, it means, from time to time, our feeling may sway, and other pretty creature may caught our attention. But we need to put in our effort to ensure that we always stay focus, and love the woman we married.
It is more of an conscious effort, rather than just feeling. I am sure you will understanding.
Right. Be sincere and be faithful with your wife.A bit of naughty (not crossing the line) is ok.
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Originally posted by xiaogougou:
Ya ya ya ...
Quit over-flattering yourself.
Hello, my front is already consider small liao, still want to flatten ar?? then become changi airport liao -
Originally posted by likeyou:
Right. Be sincere and be faithful with your wife.A bit of naughty (not crossing the line) is ok.
Just wipe yr mouth before going home. -
Originally posted by angel7030:
...but desperate
i mean ur noble.... -
Originally posted by troublemaker2005:
like real. you all believe this shittale story she made up
i can play along