Guys, Help me understand better.
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GUYS drive me crazy, would guys yourself explain to me?
1st off
My Ex-Boyfriend bothers me all the time with messages of love. He asks me sensitive questions in the name of a friend. When i ignore him he will get very depressed and emotional. I made it very clear i did not have anything to do with him. We broke up only because He didn't really care about me and treated me like i would forever be there for him.Not to mention he is dishonest. Lots of disappointment starting building up inside my heart , I had to choose to let go of someone I love very very much.
But after we break, he comes telling me that he realised he truly loved me and I was the only one for him. That he wish to get back together with me and his plans of what he will do and begging me with tears every night to be together with me. Even after i explained i no longer loved him , he swore he would wait for me to get married and before that he would always try to win back my heart.
This is already undergoing 1 month plus.
I don't want to get back together with him and I don't want him to do things for me.
I have tried means to hurt his pride, say i was cheating , say i have a boyfriend, ignore him , threaten him . But nothing works.. everything end up in tears.
Isn't there a solution where we can both be happy? What can I do to make him stop from wasting his time?
UPDATE.. (he is still pestering me now .. even being happy over my recent break up) whatever.. i cant do anything about it...
2nd off
I know a guy who say that he is interested in me. But he hardly speaks to me. But behind the scenes, he is always trying to help me out with his connections.
Does he like me anot? Why he say he like me but hardly talk to me?
Hes like MIA. I dont know & I dont care.
3rd off
1 year ago , a guy confessed to me. But i was with my Ex. 1 year later , after me and my ex broke up, he started calling me out on dinner dates, volunteering to pay for everything, including taxi fare to and fro. I don't like him and i told him that , but he say that he wanted to do so and insist.
But i don't like people paying for my fun. What can i say to him so that he treat me purely as friend and not potential girlfriend.
still the same.. but i try not to go out with him alone.. always with friends...
4th
Another confession. He is absolutely hot and gorgeous with a sexy accent. When he told me he liked me, i told him i didn't like him even though i did. Because it is too sudden you see, we only know each other for awhile.
He is also Greek. But if we know each other for only awhile and he say he like me. Is he a playboy? How can someone like another so fast?
I rejected him eventually ): he kinda proposed to me .
5th
Today, I swear i don't know what the hell is wrong with a supposedly good friend of mine.
He has been giving me that glum look and ignoring me since Monday. at first i thought it was Monday blues. But then i realise he is normal with everyone except me. I tried talking to him , I even asked him what did i do wrong for him to be mad at me. But he just ignores me which make me upset. I just want to salvage our friendship. Or if i annoy you, then just at least tell me.
The last time i saw him was in the cinema last friday. I was crying secretly and he found out.
He used to always comfort me when im down. But this sudden change of attitude...I don't know. We had a good close friendship but suddenly ignore only me. What did i do wrong? I wish to only save our friendship. It is hard to find friends you can trust with your life.
*Update I just realised we still sit at the same table and I saw him looking at me today but we just don't talk.
I apologized a 2nd time. We are good now. (:
Gahhhh thats it. I thought i understood humans. But i can't handle it anymore.
CONT> sorry fireice..
And so... its me again .. may rmb me from http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/435521
and Destiny If you R reading this... stop.. don't.
Just a question , Guys don't like girls that are too easy to get?
to people who 'know' from my other post.. you may think its weird why im asking this question now.
Because after i posted that post, i sort of knew someone and he became my boyfriend very quickly. i played easy because i like him too right.
but soon we broke up and he told his friend who happen to be on good terms with me which he didnt know that he was with me just for FUN, SEX and GAMES and i was too easy to get.
and the reason he gave me was... this 'you are too good for me, you deserve better' . after we break he still sms me good morning and his reason was because he doesen't hate me.
So hes basically talking shyt.
well anw the main question is ... GUYS just dont like girls who play easy to get right.
thank you.
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How old are you in the first place?
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i am 18 years old. i know im still young ):.
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Guys of the same age behave like chumps when they haven't been through NS.
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Boys come and go for some... but you will know when the one appear...
Btw, what you want an explanation for? Its as simple as the flowers & the bees, and the dung & the flies...
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make up your mind as to what you want la.
totally stop contacting the EX block his number etc.
continue to go out with number 4 hot and sexy de and see how it goes...so simple
as for number 5 pmsing..heck care him?
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so he's basically offering himself on a plate to you and grovelling around you - that's neither unqiue nor attractive. Rather than a guy he's acting like a needy male girlfriend. Yea. he sucks.. choose a better bf next time.
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1st guy is desperate.
2nd guy is an admirer who's scared.
3rd guy, yeh you can write him off.
4th guy, continue to know him better.
5th guy may be in a dilemma cos he's fallen for you.
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how come you got so many guys like you?
pls post a pic of you.
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You are 18yo. At this age you can afford to be self-centred, and say to hell to all those guys.
Surely you have something better to do. Do it.
Focus on your studies, and direct yourself to what you want to be in future.
All those fellas let them be.
Go your way.
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Originally posted by TIB783G:
Guys of the same age behave like chumps when they haven't been through NS.
They are all between 23~30 years old. Below 21 i still understand.. But surely 23 and above is mature enough???? That was why i was confused. Thank you for replying me though :).
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Originally posted by Aneslayer:
Boys come and go for some... but you will know when the one appear...
Btw, what you want an explanation for? Its as simple as the flowers & the bees, and the dung & the flies...
I need a explanation because I was confused. I wanted to know if i was the one at fault. Because everyone is important to me, i want people to be happy and all.
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Igottanoe The last time i did the blocking thing, I would get 20 miss calls and 20 text msg for consecutive 5 days from various numbers....
for number 4 I just ask about him because i don't want to be played. Don't feel like getting hurt again.
for number 5 We really had a really good relationship , I just hoped i could save it. but i guess i should say i tried my best.
wayne471 You totally put the thoughts in my mind in words!
Rock^Star Thank you, you make sense. But number 4 is a greek guy ... i never dated greek guys... but i will try!
gunner77 Sorry, I cannot, the whole point of me posting here anoymously is so that i can keep my identity secret and yet be able to ask for advice.
mancha I do this, i have been pouring myself into my studies, language lessons and work. But there is always one moment when you are free, and it all comes crashing to you. Its a tormenting feeling.
Thank you all for advice and bothering to reply me, I really feel so much better and very much less confuse.
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I honestly didn't read more than 5 lines of yours.
I would say, decide what is best for yourself (which probably won't be) and do as you please (but don't cry afterwards).
Whatever you do, it will teach you something so you can make a better decision next time. Have time anyway.
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For first guy, ignore his doings. Being emotional over that is normal, he is over the line and being desperate. You cannot cure desperate guys with advice, so theres nothing you can do to make him happy since you dont like him anymore.
For second guy, he is just trying to drop hints and think you might someday like him. Sounds like a shy guy. Since you dont like him, ignore him and he will give up eventually. He wants you to like him.
For third and fourth guy, same, just trying to show you they like you, pretty obvious. What do you not understand.
For last guy, he has some other personal issues on his own, not because of you.
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LMAO!!! So you thought guys are hard to understand... please try to stand in my shoes (i'm a guy)...
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Originally posted by purpleXXXXX:
i am 18 years old. i know im still young ):.
18 years old only so many problems with the opposite gender lol.
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This is commonly known as 红尘滚滚. Mastering the art of 永春拳 will be helpful....
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Originally posted by purpleXXXXX:
GUYS drive me crazy, would guys yourself explain to me?
1st off
My Ex-Boyfriend bothers me all the time with messages of love. He asks me sensitive questions in the name of a friend. When i ignore him he will get very depressed and emotional. I made it very clear i did not have anything to do with him. We broke up only because He didn't really care about me and treated me like i would forever be there for him.Not to mention he is dishonest. Lots of disappointment starting building up inside my heart , I had to choose to let go of someone I love very very much.
But after we break, he comes telling me that he realised he truly loved me and I was the only one for him. That he wish to get back together with me and his plans of what he will do and begging me with tears every night to be together with me. Even after i explained i no longer loved him , he swore he would wait for me to get married and before that he would always try to win back my heart.
This is already undergoing 1 month plus.
I don't want to get back together with him and I don't want him to do things for me.
I have tried means to hurt his pride, say i was cheating , say i have a boyfriend, ignore him , threaten him . But nothing works.. everything end up in tears.
Isn't there a solution where we can both be happy?
2nd off
I know a guy who say that he is interested in me. But he hardly speaks to me. But behind the scenes, he is always trying to help me out with his connections. I don't know what he wants.
3rd off
1 year ago , a guy confessed to me. But i was with my Ex. 1 year later , after me and my ex broke up, he started calling me out on dinner dates, volunteering to pay for everything, including taxi fare to and fro. I don't like him and i told him that , but he say that he wanted to do so. But i don't like people paying for my fun.
4th
Another confession. He is absolutely hot and gorgeous with a sexy accent. When he told me he liked me, i told him i didn't like him even though i did. Because it is too sudden you see, we only know each other for awhile.
5th
Today, I swear i don't know what the hell is wrong with a supposedly good friend of mine.
He has been giving me that glum look and ignoring me since Monday. at first i thought it was Monday blues. But then i realise he is normal with everyone except me. I tried talking to him , I even asked him what did i do wrong for him to be mad at me. But he just ignores me which make me upset. I just want to salvage our friendship. Or if i annoy you, then just at least tell me.
The last time i saw him was in the cinema last friday. I was crying secretly and he found out. He used to always comfort me when im down. But this sudden change of attitude... I don't know.
Gahhhh thats it. I thought i understood humans. But i can't handle it anymore.
You need to relax and try not to be so emotional.
1) Your feelings for him are dilluted or gone now.... Maintain a tough stand if you dont like him. No means no. Dont give any hints that you guys have a chance to patch. Its abit cruel, but necessary better than playing with his feelings. His a guy a man, he should be able to take it. These are the things that makes a person grow and become more matured.
2) Perhaps ask him ? Or perhaps he treats you like a friend. No point guessing here and there. End up in no where
3) Maintain a tough stand again, Go by dutch means go by dutch if not tell him next time you wont go out with him
4) Ohh. Spend more time with him then. Understand him better loh.
5) Ahh i think this guy also likes you. Hard to have a guy friend and purely as a friend. If suddenly he like you and you dont like him, chances are the friendship will be affected or gone...
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Originally posted by purpleXXXXX:
Igottanoe The last time i did the blocking thing, I would get 20 miss calls and 20 text msg for consecutive 5 days from various numbers....
for number 4 I just ask about him because i don't want to be played. Don't feel like getting hurt again.
for number 5 We really had a really good relationship , I just hoped i could save it. but i guess i should say i tried my best.
wayne471 You totally put the thoughts in my mind in words!
Rock^Star Thank you, you make sense. But number 4 is a greek guy ... i never dated greek guys... but i will try!
gunner77 Sorry, I cannot, the whole point of me posting here anoymously is so that i can keep my identity secret and yet be able to ask for advice.
mancha I do this, i have been pouring myself into my studies, language lessons and work. But there is always one moment when you are free, and it all comes crashing to you. Its a tormenting feeling.
Thank you all for advice and bothering to reply me, I really feel so much better and very much less confuse.
No.4's Greek? Family must come from the shipping industry if they're here this part of the world. Used to have a buddy who's Greek.
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Hi purpleXXXXX I am not a adviser, but I hope what I am going to say can help you: 1. There is no solution to that. It is either he will be happy and you will be unhappy or you will be happy and he will be unhappy. There is no way you can stop him from wasting his time as you had said it is his time. In fact, I will say instead of trying to stop him wasting his time, why you don't stop wasting your time in trying to find way to stop him wasting his time. TIH(Totally Ignore Him). 2. Well whether he like you or not, only he himself will know. It is possible that he is shy or he is a man of few words or maybe he is just plain creepy. In a matter of fact, I don't even know him enough to judge him let alone knowing what is his feeling for you. The main question here shall be what is your feeling for him after he had told you he like you (remember like is different from love). 3. Like I say you can't stop people from doing what they want to do. Likewise they can't stop you from doing what you want to do. You can always tell him that if he don't stop paying for you, you will not go out with him. But for me, I will just accept it and tell him I don't him anything as I am doing him a favour in accepting his willingness to pay for me. (For those who want to flame, FYI I am a guy) 4. Well for this guy, it is really up to you to decide. But if you ask me, I will not really take their words too seriously. You have to understand that there are some people who can say 'I Love You' as easy as 'Good Morning'. And they won't mind using it to achieve what they want. Therefore you may want to slow your pace with him and get to know him better first (I mean his character not his body) 5. Finally, your last guy. Frankly I am not sure what get into him, he could be having PMS or he could have heard some bad rumors about you. I will say first ignore him for a few days. After that, find a good time where you and him can have a good talk and clearify any misunderstanding if there is any. If not, hey you can always use the good old method, write him a letter and remember to send it to him.
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my suggestion is dun mess with boys, be a lesbian, gals will understand you better. Free come to my pub at neil road, 23, good luck
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Originally posted by purpleXXXXX:
They are all between 23~30 years old. Below 21 i still understand.. But surely 23 and above is mature enough???? That was why i was confused. Thank you for replying me though :).
Wow first time I heard people older than me behaving like chumps.
But after NS should be matured what, for guys.
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Originally posted by angel7030:
my suggestion is dun mess with boys, be a lesbian, gals will understand you better. Free come to my pub at neil road, 23, good luck
Im not cut out to be a lesbian.. I have rejected them all... thanks anyway.
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Originally posted by Varatare76:
Hi purpleXXXXX
I am not a adviser, but I hope what I am going to say can help you:
1. There is no solution to that. It is either he will be happy and you will be unhappy or you will be happy and he will be unhappy. There is no way you can stop him from wasting his time as you had said it is his time.
In fact, I will say instead of trying to stop him wasting his time, why you don’t stop wasting your time in trying to find way to stop him wasting his time. TIH.
2. Well whether he like you or not, only he himself will know. It is possible that he is shy or he is a man of few words or maybe he is just plain creepy. In a matter of fact, I don’t even know him enough to judge him let alone knowing what is his feeling for you.
The main question here shall be what is your feeling for him after he had told you he like you (remember like is different from love).
3. Like I say you can’t stop people from doing what they want to do. Likewise they can’t stop you from doing what you want to do.
You can always tell him that if he don’t stop paying for you, you will not go out with him. But for me, I will just accept it and tell him I don’t him anything as I am doing him a favour in accepting his willingness to pay for me. (For those who want to flame, FYI I am a guy)
4. Well for this guy, it is really up to you to decide. But if you ask me, I will not really take their words too seriously. You have to understand that there are some people who can say ‘I Love You’ as easy as ‘Good Morning’. And they won’t mind using it to achieve what they want. Therefore you may want to slow your pace with him and get to know him better first (I mean his character not his body)
5. Finally, your last guy. Frankly I am not sure what get into him, he could be having PMS or he could have heard some bad rumors about you. I will say first ignore him for a few days. After that, find a good time where you and him can have a good talk and clearify any misunderstanding if there is any.
If not, hey you can always use the good old method, write him a letter and remember to send it to him.
You are very helpful , Thank you very much for your time and effort.