Dear fellow forumers,
Hello there.
First of all, let me do a bit of an introduction of myself since it is my first post here.
I am 28 this year, currently working as a higher level executive in a local company, and is also pursuing a bachelors honours degree. About 2 years ago, I married a China girl in Singapore. Yes, initially I thought my life is fulfilling, having a good career with good pay and decent bonuses, and good future, got a loving wife and planning to have kids, but now, things are not what it had seemed.
Initially, she left my side due to her critically ill mother who was diagnosed with stomach cancer not long after we ROM. As a caring and understanding husband, I did not hesitate to allow her to go back and care for her dying mother which doctors predicted that she has only a year or so to live. All I thought of was, to let her mum to be cared for and to allow my wife to fulfill her fillial peity.
I do visit her a few times a while when she is back in China, and remain in close contact through SMSes and phone calls. However, things have turned for the worse and we ended up quarrelling over the phone over certain issues frequently. I do not blame her for being like this partly due to her mother's condition
Lately, for the past few months, she has remain uncontactable, and I am eager to know about her whereabouts. The thought of her going missing or being harmed frequently bothers my mind that I suffer mild depression, ending up neglecting my studies and under-performing my job.
I am a desperate man now wanting to know about the whereabouts of my beloved wife, but I do not know how do I start with. I have thought of seeking help from the embassy of China, but chances of them assisting to locate my wife is slim due to the vast population in China.
I am at my wits end, thats why I am writing in SGforums to seek advises. Non constructive sentences are not welcomed in this thread. I seek your understanding.
Please help me .... Thank you very much and I am truly grateful
first, lodge a police report (maybe she could be around for all u do not know)...police will advise u to further check with the embassy for help...
the authorities would also need some leads as to her home contacts, friends etc. and what are some of her other behaviours and stuffs leading to her sudden dissapearance...
its also good to check with the lawyers on matrimony issues if any claims were to arise in the future....there is certainly a time bar on such issues....and i believe she may turn up one day for it if that's her plan and intentions...
with so many news of PRC gals cheating on local men....this may be a possibility...
ACT NOW!
as long as there's no financial loss..............it's your GAIN..........!!!
if you can dump a PRC slut for free.............it's time to celebrate...............
let this be a lesson to you.
Bro Fcukpap,
Thank you for your advise. I have her necessary documents like passport details etc, but i do not have her exacts contacts in china.
I strongly do not think she is around in singapore because she will still need Visa applications through spouse.
all the best... and take care
FOR THE LAST TIME: UNWANTED / IMMATURE COMMENTS ARE NOT WELCOMED. MY TOLERANCE IS LIMITED.
Originally posted by DryTears83:FOR THE LAST TIME: UNWANTED / IMMATURE COMMENTS ARE NOT WELCOMED. MY TOLERANCE IS LIMITED.
SO?
smells fishy don't you think DryTears83??? Cancer has several stages(severity), your China wife should have told you about her mother before ROM. Only after ROM she tells you her mum is critically ill. I don't buy it at all. Sorry to be blunt here.
wait wait.....how did the both of you know each other in the first place? Do you know her background well?
any joint properties and assets ? any insurance beneficiary in her name ? CPF nominations ?
now's the time to review these things, before you plan your next step dude .....
fly to her hometown?
yes her background is impt. doubt u will marry her without noeing anything. unless through those agency then there is chace of running away.
but from another view, u din mention she cheat ur money.so i don thin she ran away.
as u mentioned, u 2 quarrelled, maybe she belongs to those type that need cool down time.
lastly,which part of china she stay?maybe that place was flooded?drought?snow?accident?good luck
incase of anything,lodge a report that ur wife went missing, so that next time when u wanna fly without her again. it will be easier for u.
jus wait for reply
"I do visit her a few times a while when she is back in China"
this means you know her address
when was the last time you checked whether she was there?
are you saying the poeple in that house have all vacated?
new owners also should know the contact of the old owners
a few hundred RMB will get them to disclose oredi
or get PI's or gongan's help
just cut loss
u must be prepared that what u think u know is different from the truth.
Dear fellow forumers, the man is already feeling depressed, he mentioned that he is unable to contact his wife, that's it, so I would kindly ask all of you to avoid the wild guessing. Contribute if you can help or simply move along if you have nothing to offer, not too difficult right?
Hey DryTears83, like what Fcukpap mentioned, you should contact the police for help, afterall, your wife has been missing for months, and that's a really long time. Try to deal with it step by step, hope all turns out well for you.
Ask a lawyer if you can file for divorce on grounds that she has went missing.
Than look for a another better woman to be your wife
u cant jus divorce jus like that. i had a fren whose husband was from china, that he let her wear green hat and she jus send him home.she wans a divorce but the lawyer said cant. they said u either report lost and make a newspaper publisher that this man went missing for how long(atleast 2 year then u can divorce). or u must 分居 for 2 year also.signing a paper is easy,
The police report on missing wife would establish the date she went missing.
No report, it would only be your word against hers.
Keep record of attempts to contact her. Telephone calls, SMS, registered mails.
She may be trying to contact you, or may be don't want to contact you.
ROM means what. Registered your intent to get married, or solemnised?
If solemnised, she is your legal wife, with all the rights and privileges of a wife. This might complicates your personal matters in later life.
Most important question, What does she mean to you?
This will decide if your career is more important then her.
Will you abandon everything and go searching for her, because you love her?
Originally posted by Fcukpap:first, lodge a police report (maybe she could be around for all u do not know)...police will advise u to further check with the embassy for help...
the authorities would also need some leads as to her home contacts, friends etc. and what are some of her other behaviours and stuffs leading to her sudden dissapearance...
its also good to check with the lawyers on matrimony issues if any claims were to arise in the future....there is certainly a time bar on such issues....and i believe she may turn up one day for it if that's her plan and intentions...
with so many news of PRC gals cheating on local men....this may be a possibility...
ACT NOW!
stop jumping to conclusions. the TS did not say a single thing about his wife cheating on him.
if you have nothing better to say then shut up. stop being biased against PRCs.
the PRCs themselves give us good reasons to despise them not biased against them
So what happens after you found her again ?
Get into another argument ?
Drag her back to Singapore and lock her up in the bedroom ?
What was the condition of your marriage when she left to China ?
Using authorities to locate her ? Put a warrant out for her ?
She is a woman, not your slave.
Her family will contact you the husband if she is really missing.
Unfortunately, it seems even her own family members are helping her HIDE from you. That tells a lot about the marriage, and what she or her family truly thinks about you.
Let her go, if she truly thinks you are her soulmate, she'll come back. Can't force love.
Go and finish your studies and don't let your career go to ruin.
then again, it might be a well thought out strategy from the China wife. Marry, leave country for a few months, make husband desperate, and finally make the move of asking the husband to send money to China because of the "mother". Beware fellow Singaporean! too many have fallen into this trap!