gf & parents problem
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hi
I got a problem.
me and my gf have decided to break up when this year end. the reason is cause of our religion and race issues.
we still love each other but she dont wish to carry on anymore cause she say she's stress with hiding our r/s from her parents especialy her mum.
she's brought up in a quite religious buddhist family and she's very filial to her parents. her parents live in jb while she live and work in sg.
as her mum dont know about me, she thinks that she's hanging around with bad company. everytime go out and even seldom go back jb anymore.
oh ya.. she works shift work with only 2 off day per week. not only is she working, she's also doing her part time degree here. thus making her not want to go back jb even more as her schedule is pretty hectic. but her mum dont understand this part and my gf dont even want to explain to her as she feel guilty not going back.
I want to clarify and take responsibility of her actions to her parents. I got her house phone number. should i arrange for a meet up in jb?
I cant let my gf know also cause she dont want me to be involve in her family matters. but i think, i should explain everything to her parents from a-z wad happen to her daughter as im part of it.
from wad i heard about her, her parents are abit racist and stereotype my race. well, i dont blame them.
i'm having sleepless night thinking whether i should do it or not. should i? how should i go about doing it?
help
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tricky issue.
cuz u r doing this w/o her knowledge
u wont know wad her reactions will be.
she might be very buay song at u EVEN if her parents approve of u n understand her plight.
cuz u jitao skipped her.
but if i were u i will just do it.
so that her parents know wad shes been doing n will stop imagining stuffs
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Not a good idea cause the two of you broke up. And now interfering with her family without her knowing will be bad. Perhaps you should ask her first. And as for the religion/race issue, if her family cant take the difference, i suggest remain as friends and move on.
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Originally posted by ifish:
hi
I got a problem.
me and my gf have decided to break up when this year end. the reason is cause of our religion and race issues.
we still love each other but she dont wish to carry on anymore cause she say she's stress with hiding our r/s from her parents especialy her mum.
she's brought up in a quite religious buddhist family and she's very filial to her parents. her parents live in jb while she live and work in sg.
as her mum dont know about me, she thinks that she's hanging around with bad company. everytime go out and even seldom go back jb anymore.
oh ya.. she works shift work with only 2 off day per week. not only is she working, she's also doing her part time degree here. thus making her not want to go back jb even more as her schedule is pretty hectic. but her mum dont understand this part and my gf dont even want to explain to her as she feel guilty not going back.
I want to clarify and take responsibility of her actions to her parents. I got her house phone number. should i arrange for a meet up in jb?
I cant let my gf know also cause she dont want me to be involve in her family matters. but i think, i should explain everything to her parents from a-z wad happen to her daughter as im part of it.
from wad i heard about her, her parents are abit racist and stereotype my race. well, i dont blame them.
i'm having sleepless night thinking whether i should do it or not. should i? how should i go about doing it?
help
You can rekomen her to me. I am buddhist. I will take good care of her for you. And her parent will feel very safe when she is wif me. Trust me, she is in good hands. -
im not going to ask for her parents approval.
will accept and respect both her parents and gf decision if they wan to end this rs.
i just dont think it's right making her parents worry unnecessarily.they even want her to put gf degree on hold and make sure she come back every off day cause they think "she mixing with the wrong kind"
this shouldnt be the way..
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money is the universal solution to all differences
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You have good intentions here - but think it through one last time before you come to a decision.
Will she be in any form of trouble even if you come clean with her parents?
Will there be a strain on their family ties between them because there was already deception involved?
Will she hate you for doing this (even if it's for her own good and because you love her and it's the right thing to do) without her knowledge?
Don't forget - your girlfriend has already lied to her parents - they might not take such deceit well, even IF you are decent enough to tell them the truth.
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<Double Post>
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i dun think she would be happy if u jump straight to her parents.
and wat makes u think the parents would even give u a chance to tok to them?
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You already say her parents racist and stereotype your race, then even if you go JB, what makes you think her parents will even want to talk to you?
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TS, I love her too. Don't pursue the relationship.
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She should talk to her parents about her work and studies. She also has to be responsible for her choices in life. You should support her. But if you decided anything and choose to do anything beyond, then I wish you good luck.
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you guys are right..
i think i should go via my gf. even if it's on the phone, i think i should at least apologise for my gf's behavior when she's with me.
i'll talk to her tmr about this. hope she agrees with me.
i feel guilty for deceiving and making my gf deceive them too.
i really want to say sorry.
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I don't think she loves you enough if she's willing to end the r/s so that she doesn't have to explain things to her family.
I think that ultimately, she has to be the one to break the news to her family. Not you.
If she was serious about you, she would have brought you back to meet her family, regardless of how they might react.
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it is very important to know the family background, race and religion of someone before dating him/her and such factors are even more important when it comes to marriage
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Originally posted by Julian.khor:
You can rekomen her to me. I am buddhist. I will take good care of her for you. And her parent will feel very safe when she is wif me. Trust me, she is in good hands.
yr trust can become thrust...better not....there are lots of tiko buddhist monk in this world -
Originally posted by ifish:
hi
I got a problem.
me and my gf have decided to break up when this year end. the reason is cause of our religion and race issues.
we still love each other but she dont wish to carry on anymore cause she say she's stress with hiding our r/s from her parents especialy her mum.
she's brought up in a quite religious buddhist family and she's very filial to her parents. her parents live in jb while she live and work in sg.
as her mum dont know about me, she thinks that she's hanging around with bad company. everytime go out and even seldom go back jb anymore.
oh ya.. she works shift work with only 2 off day per week. not only is she working, she's also doing her part time degree here. thus making her not want to go back jb even more as her schedule is pretty hectic. but her mum dont understand this part and my gf dont even want to explain to her as she feel guilty not going back.
I want to clarify and take responsibility of her actions to her parents. I got her house phone number. should i arrange for a meet up in jb?
I cant let my gf know also cause she dont want me to be involve in her family matters. but i think, i should explain everything to her parents from a-z wad happen to her daughter as im part of it.
from wad i heard about her, her parents are abit racist and stereotype my race. well, i dont blame them.
i'm having sleepless night thinking whether i should do it or not. should i? how should i go about doing it?
help
Aiya, since agree to breakoff, talk so much for what, just let my sister (yr gf) go lah, people also have their own life, cannot fit each other why make people life harder?