Being a divorcee in Singapore
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I think angmo dun mind divorcee....most asian males will mind....
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seeing around me, quite a hand full. most are malaysian chinese professional though. how about ur side?
my friend just intro me a malaysian chinese professional. she is cute (her dreamy eyes really killer) and is quite understanding in terms of relationship. really a good wife material as compared to the other sg gals i am dating so far. except for a few bimbos, the sg gals i dated so far are quite decent and well mannered. maybe i should give other nationality a chance this time round.
one thing for sure, sg lady hitting 29 and 30, they tone down their expectation alot. they are much friendlier, down to earth and easy going than their 20s peers. if u dont mind the age, most guys can find happiness in age group 29-33. :)
Originally posted by Demon Bane:Is it becoming popular for SG men to find wives from overseas? I think only minority leh....got alot of people do that meh?
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Originally posted by Laverne:
Thanks for your replies.
It would not matter to me if the reason for objecting to getting along with a divorcee is that she is someone who was "used". A woman is a human, not an object. I know a traditional, patriarchal society sees it as a man's world but nonetheless, appraising anyone basing on "new" and "used" isn't respectful, not even to a bachelorette whom they classify as "new", so let alone using such measures to gauge the value of your life partner.
There are indeed valuable principles of a traditional and even a patriarchal society. I think the main value of patriarchy is the order and harmony it creates within the unit. It should not be about power and dominance. That is abusing the system. I would for instance, understand if the stigma of being associated with divorce is related to the idea of a broken family unit, or a woman who was non-virtuous or not dutiful. I can even understand if there is this discomfort in knowing that the person you're closing a once-in-a-lifetime and sacred ceremony (aka marriage) with, isn't doing it for the first time. But in the case of measuring a person basing a "new-old-discarded-etc" rating, it is simply an issue of the man's character. It is has nothing to do with being traditional. And living with someone of such a character might lead to other complications in the marriage.
Anyway, AFB does have a point in saying that we are marrying just one person at the end of the day, so all the different opinions of the society do not matter. But psychologically, I am affected. It's because when I get into a new relationship and find a great guy who loves me for who I am, I hope I can give him the best too. Hence how the society sees his wife (i.e. me) would be important to me because I would like to be the best possible person he can marry. And the reason why I wouldn't disclose my marital status, since no one at home knows about it afterall, isn't really because of my own reputation. It's mainly so that my future partner wouldn't have to face any unnecessary stress.
This was posted by Laverne, not by me....
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Originally posted by Demon Bane:
I think angmo dun mind divorcee....most asian males will mind....
it is good to keep some of our asian values, one partner, one family forever. Asian males or females are cultured in a way to have one partner and family until the west arrive. -
I think its harder life for a divorced woman than a divorced man....
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Not really, I got a divorced woman friend who is very rich, everytime come here to drink and look for giggolos, she also got a young daughter studying, not only she got some assets (private properties) from her ex, she also managed to claim alimony from her ex, i heard monthly, about a few thousands.
A very happy divorcee, I need to learn from her. Alway come in order martel
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Originally posted by angel7030:
Not really, I got a divorced woman friend who is very rich, everytime come here to drink and look for giggolos, she also got a young daughter studying, not only she got some assets (private properties) from her ex, she also managed to claim alimony from her ex, i heard monthly, about a few thousands.
A very happy divorcee, I need to learn from her. Alway come in order martel
Your pub make alot of $ ? I have a fren also in the pub biz....si beh pai tan leh...
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Originally posted by Demon Bane:
Your pub make alot of $ ? I have a fren also in the pub biz....si beh pai tan leh...
not all make money lah, depend what type of gal you have, you get those lau lau one, sure pop lah -
Originally posted by angel7030:
not all make money lah, depend what type of gal you have, you get those lau lau one, sure pop lahAre you struggling with moral issues? I mean u see people indulge in fantasies and people that cheat on their spouses daily....how do you sleep at all?
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Originally posted by Demon Bane:
Are you struggling with moral issues? I mean u see people indulge in fantasy and people that cheat on their spouses daily....how do you sleep at night?
Hello, this indulge is not new leh, since thousand years ago, there is already cheating of spouses and male indugling in brothels, so what do you expect those owner sleep at nite??? like me lor, sleep like a pig with money below the pillow ...except I dun snore. -
Originally posted by angel7030:
Hello, this indulge is not new leh, since thousand years ago, there is already cheating of spouses and male indugling in brothels, so what do you expect those owner sleep at nite??? like me lor, sleep like a pig with money below the pillow ...except I dun snore.This kind of $ u dun make other people also rush in to make hor....not for me....its not very morally correct leh....Buddha said "right livelihood"...must follow Buddha mah....
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TAKES A FAT SAUSAGE AND WHACKS IT ON ANGEL7030 HEAD.....SEES SAUSAGE SNAP INTO 2.
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Originally posted by angel7030:
Hello, this indulge is not new leh, since thousand years ago, there is already cheating of spouses and male indugling in brothels, so what do you expect those owner sleep at nite??? like me lor, sleep like a pig with money below the pillow ...except I dun snore.
U HAVE INDEED DESCRIBED YERSELF WELL AS A MADE IN TAIWAN BLOWN UP SEX DOLL.:) -
Buddha said life is yours, I am just selling drinks, people come and have a relax after a hard day work, Buddha should have blessed me for providing to place for them to relax and at peace. Buddha also said, "laymen cannot escape from carving and greed, it is their nature, but try to refrain from doing it extensive, or better still, control oneself, they tends to do more harm to the society if their carving and greed are not satisfied"
My job here is to reduce that social impact by offering these craving and greedy laymen a place to find resolution rather than having them in desparate to find a way out, with no place to go, may end up committing more sins.
Capitalism, an exploitation of the lower people is also a sin, high taxation by the govt is also a sin, buying and making arms is also a sin, making chemical and condemning the air is also a sin etc etc...there are so many sin...I am just trying to release people stress from all these sins by offering them a drink, a nice cozy place with good music and nice people to chat.
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Originally posted by Hitman 2010:
U HAVE INDEED DESCRIBED YERSELF WELL AS A MADE IN TAIWAN BLOWN UP SEX DOLL.:)
not sex bomb meh??...sex bomb,...sex bomb....made in japan better lah, made in taiwan, half way blown up, end up in hospital then you know...
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Originally posted by angel7030:
Buddha said life is yours, I am just selling drinks, people come and have a relax after a hard day work, Buddha should have blessed me for providing to place for them to relax and at peace. Buddha also said, "laymen cannot escape from carving and greed, it is their nature, but try to refrain from doing it extensive, or better still, control oneself, they tends to do more harm to the society if their carving and greed are not satisfied"
My job here is to reduce that social impact by offering these craving and greedy laymen a place to find resolution rather than having them in desparate to find a way out, with no place to go, may end up committing more sins.
Capitalism, an exploitation of the lower people is also a sin, high taxation by the govt is also a sin, buying and making arms is also a sin, making chemical and condemning the air is also a sin etc etc...there are so many sin...I am just trying to release people stress from all these sins by offering them a drink, a nice cozy place with good music and nice people to chat.
That's how u convince yourself? Good point...but I still can't handle it leh...just like my fren ask me to join them to setup a pub....I also rejected their offer....I can't fail my own moral test....
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Originally posted by Demon Bane:
That's how u convince yourself? Good point...but I still can't handle it leh...just like my fren ask me to join them to setup a pub....I also rejected their offer....I can't fail my own moral test....
Pub has been one of the oldest industrial, ever since ancient brewery was found in armenia 6 centuries ago, it is nothing more like a western kopitiam, if you go to the west, pub are their kopitam, so you are telling me those open kopitiam also got moral issue?? Me making a living by offering drinks and a place to relax also got moral issue?? -
Originally posted by angel7030:
Pub has been one of the oldest industrial, ever since ancient brewery was found in armenia 6 centuries ago, it is nothing more like a western kopitiam, if you go to the west, pub are their kopitam, so you are telling me those open kopitiam also got moral issue?? Me making a living by offering drinks and a place to relax also got moral issue??You have a good point there....
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unless u see alcohol as a sin, open a pub is perfectly alright. it is a place where people want to chill and feel like home. of cuz, some pub in boat quay has pinoy gals who scantily dressed and get touchy. i am not referring to those as i believe they are mostly flaunting the law.
i think the rest of the pubs who has waitress accompany customer are pretty alright. what a male customer wants at the end of the day is fun company time through ktv/pool/chit chatting/playing games. of cuz looks does comes into play when attracting the bee into the pub.
it is not easy to run a pub and customer retention is very impt as ur waitresses are your most impt proxy to your customers.
Originally posted by Demon Bane:That's how u convince yourself? Good point...but I still can't handle it leh...just like my fren ask me to join them to setup a pub....I also rejected their offer....I can't fail my own moral test....
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No lah....there are other biz better than setting up a pub....maybe a high class restaurant? Hahaha!
Anyway, I think being a divorcee in SG is becoming quite common...so not much problems....the challenge is to raise their kids properly.... -
ya, like what Zalee1 said, open pub is not easy, just like any other business, it all a matter of you see me good and i see you good, but suffering who knows?? from pub you can go into restaurant, like me, i get a small resturant opposite my pub, next to the famous joo chiat bakut teh, my intention is not to sell food, but since customer in pub sometime demand for food, and i hv to order from a source which use to delay, i might as well employ 2 zhi char cooks and start a food business that can serve both the public and my pub and other pubs order. Business need to use brain hor, not gong gong people said good you go in hor...later get stuck and cannot get out
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Originally posted by angel7030:
ya, like what Zalee1 said, open pub is not easy, just like any other business, it all a matter of you see me good and i see you good, but suffering who knows?? from pub you can go into restaurant, like me, i get a small resturant opposite my pub, next to the famous joo chiat bakut teh, my intention is not to sell food, but since customer in pub sometime demand for food, and i hv to order from a source which use to delay, i might as well employ 2 zhi char cooks and start a food business that can serve both the public and my pub and other pubs order. Business need to use brain hor, not gong gong people said good you go in hor...later get stuck and cannot get out
Wah you really an entrepreneur! My frens jio me to setup high-class restaurant....hope can make $....Seems to me you are happy....
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Originally posted by Laverne:
Sorry I deleted that part of my post, too much details. But yea, you got the story ;-)
I don't think that the local girls are blaming foreign women or whatsoever. It's just discrimination in general. I really think Singaporean girls are fine. They are simple, hardworking and rather capable. Not many asian girls contribute to the family finances but most Singaporean girls do. It isn't easy for a woman you know, juggling both the household and work.
Honestly lah...if a Singaporean guy has a choice between a local and a foreign girl, my advice would be for him to choose the local one. At least local girls are simplier, many foreign girls have other motives when finally deciding to marry a man (whether it's in Singapore, or back in their own countries).
I will recommend my friends to get export set, rather than sg girls....
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Originally posted by Demon Bane:
This was posted by Laverne, not by me....
i have no idea how your name got there. lol.