okay, i have a gf for 1 1/2 years now. and from the start until now, she have never treated me nice or right.But in the past i usually tolerated it, for i love her alot and i believe deep down she loves me too, but now, im emotionally drained.
In the beginning, while she was with me, she kept thinking of her ex-bf and need him to stay by her side like SMS her meet her often etc. to the extend of sending him i miss you so much kinda msges. At those times i wanted to leave, but she kept holding me back, saying she need me as well. We quarreled and fought over this but in the end, she gave him up, in that romantic kind of way. but theyare neutral friends now.
After that issue, i thought everything was going to be fine but it was just the beginning. As we grew closer, her true colours came out. She would attitude me or not respond to me talking to her for absolutely no reason or for minor reasons like for eg. me giving her the wrong color of the towels or if i cant hear what she is saying cause sometimes she talks really dam soft. We have occasional quarrels over this and the cycle always goes like this. She starts throwing tantrum > me Confronting her > She throws even bigger longer tantrums > until i have to apologize and wait for 3-7days til she cools down.
Then, she got a part time job at the same company as me, but different working locations. Every morning, she would throw tantrum and give attitude because i am not ready preparing, or prepare slower than her every morning (She lives with me). and the reason she gives is I didnt pack her bag for her, or she is tired sleepy. Until i had enough, i started feeling numb and not giving a dam. but she noticed my change, i really wanted a clean break but she kept threatening me with suicide and stuff like that and kept forcing me to take off to accompany her but i really cant.until i quitted my job as i cannot take the pressure.
After that incident, feeling guilty of the way i treated her during the phase in the above paragraph, i treated her even better than i used to, and no confrontation nothing if she starts her nonsense. i just 'bao rong' embrace her. And she had never done anything for me before, even if i ask her to pass me a tissue something like that. this continued until recently.
Today. For the past week she've been throwing tantrums in the morning, like that period of time she went to work (now shes studying) and throwing tantrums after school for being tired. i really cant take this anymore. until a few days ago, i couldnt take off on her off day(from private school), she started contacting her another ex-bf whom they had a physical r/s with. meaning just sexual. I couldnt take it. As i do not have any evidence, (she would say, we are just friends what now.) i cant say anything, but because of me not being able to accompany her for one day. she have to do this to me. Dear forummers, what should i do????
SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY PLS...
dump her -fast.
she is only draining u - u want that?
be glad u both are not married as that will be a never-ending sorrow for u.
tell her u need a break.
u need ur life back.
coz u really do need that.
ask her to go to her ex.
let her ex pick up all the shit from her.
u have enuff already!
this type of girl better get rid of quick lah.................
but must screw her at least once before lah..........
if already slept with her ..............then what are you waiting for ???!!!
u should be with a person who can live with you peacefully and communicate with you well.why choose a 'tantrum-thrower' to kill yourself slowly?
I love her alot really. we have lived together for 20months, i cant just call it off. Ive given up my total social life to settle down with her. but i just need to know what shld i do?
Anyway do you all think she really do love me? i believe so but i do not know why she is acting like this. Thanks for all the comments anyway. i really hope to find a solution
Best is to pretend u don't care and live ur life without her - well.
she will be most bang .anyway, i can reassure u, she will not be happy with
anyone..dun care which ex.
her character, no men will tahan for long .
in future when she got same issues with whoever, she will call u back to spite that person.
this type of girl is like that. wanna use jealousies to get back at men.
dun fall for her silly ploys.
You dare not leave coz u scared of the life adjustments. But come on..
how long u wanna live with this gal? u think ur relationship with her is really love?
If is love then why u are so unhappy?? Why u need to have such drastic changes in ur life for her? why be with such a selfish and insensitive b*t*h?
But is ur life..your choice.
You make the CHOICE,
You live with the consequences.
wat r u workin as?
Admin job. why?
just let u know..even if u marry her...and u both quarrel..she will still look for other men to seek solace.coz in her heart, u are not the best. no offense. look for a better gal who will put u highest in her heart.
coz ur engrish isnt beri gd loh.
anyway, me tink dat u shld mk a clean break.
u nit to achieve more wif ur life.
Okay thanks. I will consider the break up but i need to know the answer.
because in my opinion if she deep down somewhere truly loves me, i wont let her go. its hard to find 2 person who loves each other
anyway i really treat her 100% best, sacrifices, love everything i gave her. so why wont she put me as the best in her heart
and seriously ive seen all her ex and everything, I have to admit im hotter than all of them. so not bragging, but ive actually trounce every single man in her life, but why she still treats me like this?
stop kiddin urself can!
u know so many broken marriages are existing now because pple marry when they were like in ur case (during courtship years) ..marry coz out of pity..coz too long together ,coz need a flat ....all sort of shit.
in the end..u also will find someone else.and she too.
i see too much of such cases in the past already that's why i say that much to u.
no offense.
none taken i understand. but how do i overcome the feeling i have. like i imagine her in the future with someone else be it outside in the bedroom something like that i cant take it. Then ill hold on to her even more. I know its wrong but what can i do to help it?
Go get busy with more pple , go out with the buddies ..sooner or later u will get a better gal .
even if she is with another guy so what? pity that new victim.
she would be most bang to see you with a new chix in future also ...and that u no longer need to tolerate tantrum craps again.
after break-up is the temporary time of adjustment ..but this important period must occur before u can finally move on to a better new life.
or u wanna hang on to ur current miserable life?
temporary pain or permanent pain througout your marriage.
only u can make the choice.
seriously and ä¸¥æ ¼æ�¥è¯´....throw her away and move on
Well sit down and talk to her if she is interested to work on the issues in the relationship as much as you wish to. Make it clear you still love her but she needs to grow up.
However, if she refuses or does not want to work out the issues, then there isn't any point trying alone on your side. How long can you be the nanny of a spoilt thoughtless brat?
I read the part that you PACK HER BAG for her.. I also want to faint liao. Your daughter or your girlfriend?
A relationship is supposed to be blissful and full of happiness. Not agonizing and torturing. I believe it is time to let her go. She wants to go f*%k around with her ex-boyfriends, by all means let her go do that. Don't be fooled by her words and your own feelings. Think with your brain, not with your heart!
In a nutshell, she will not be happy with you or any other guy in the long run simply because her attitude sucks! You know it yourself. If not, why would your thread title be "My gf has a horrible attitude"???
break her S$200 crystal nails first before you leave.....hehe
break up la
so simple also need to ask meh.
Hello TS, you say until so jialat means break up liao.
deep down inside you know you want to break up.
Originally posted by Yingjunminx:okay, i have a gf for 1 1/2 years now. and from the start until now, she have never treated me nice or right.But in the past i usually tolerated it, for i love her alot and i believe deep down she loves me too, but now, im emotionally drained.
In the beginning, while she was with me, she kept thinking of her ex-bf and need him to stay by her side like SMS her meet her often etc. to the extend of sending him i miss you so much kinda msges. At those times i wanted to leave, but she kept holding me back, saying she need me as well. We quarreled and fought over this but in the end, she gave him up, in that romantic kind of way. but theyare neutral friends now.
After that issue, i thought everything was going to be fine but it was just the beginning. As we grew closer, her true colours came out. She would attitude me or not respond to me talking to her for absolutely no reason or for minor reasons like for eg. me giving her the wrong color of the towels or if i cant hear what she is saying cause sometimes she talks really dam soft. We have occasional quarrels over this and the cycle always goes like this. She starts throwing tantrum > me Confronting her > She throws even bigger longer tantrums > until i have to apologize and wait for 3-7days til she cools down.
Then, she got a part time job at the same company as me, but different working locations. Every morning, she would throw tantrum and give attitude because i am not ready preparing, or prepare slower than her every morning (She lives with me). and the reason she gives is I didnt pack her bag for her, or she is tired sleepy. Until i had enough, i started feeling numb and not giving a dam. but she noticed my change, i really wanted a clean break but she kept threatening me with suicide and stuff like that and kept forcing me to take off to accompany her but i really cant.until i quitted my job as i cannot take the pressure.
After that incident, feeling guilty of the way i treated her during the phase in the above paragraph, i treated her even better than i used to, and no confrontation nothing if she starts her nonsense. i just 'bao rong' embrace her. And she had never done anything for me before, even if i ask her to pass me a tissue something like that. this continued until recently.
Today. For the past week she've been throwing tantrums in the morning, like that period of time she went to work (now shes studying) and throwing tantrums after school for being tired. i really cant take this anymore. until a few days ago, i couldnt take off on her off day(from private school), she started contacting her another ex-bf whom they had a physical r/s with. meaning just sexual. I couldnt take it. As i do not have any evidence, (she would say, we are just friends what now.) i cant say anything, but because of me not being able to accompany her for one day. she have to do this to me. Dear forummers, what should i do????
SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY PLS...
Have you ever considered why she has so many ex-boyfriends? The answer should be pretty clear now.
You should end the relationship and not be threatened by her threats. She has probably threatened to kill herself to a number of her ex-bf while she is in a relationship with them, and you can see that she is still alive and well. On the contrary, you are alive but not well.
Some men are horrible. They dump girls like garbage. But clearly your case is much different from that, and if you allow yourself to be a anger-venting mechanism any longer, I have confidence that the relationship will end in a very horrible way than it will now.
And just as shrodingercat mentioned, you are a boyfriend, not a father. Even a father does not deserve to be treated like this by his daughter.
IMHO, if a person who is not mature enough place keeping an at least cordial relationship over his/her own feelings is more trouble than they are worth. Cos snowball effect makes things worse.
It just seems that you are like a float. For her to hang on to until a rescue ship comes by.
If you cant reconcilate with such behaviour and basket of values/beliefs. Its more prudent to end it.